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Tips and Tools for Character Builders Building Character in Young Hearts and Growing Minds September 27, 2005 Contents The Discipline Stick-Part 2, Firmness Parenting Tip Childhood Wisdom About the Author Dear Jean, Our last newsletter exposed one side of the Discipline Stick - Kindness. This week we'll examine the opposite side - Firmness You'll even learn the secret to parenting Just Right. Jean Tracy, "Granny Jean" The Discipline Stick-Part 2, Firmness I remember a very strict dad. He never hit, rarely spoke, and when he did he usually said, "No." He measured 9 on the 10 point scale of the Discipline Stick. He considered himself the king of his household. He even demanded that his kids stay in their yard all day every day. Guess what? His kids played in the street, in their friend's homes, and built forts in the woods. Everyday they raced home before their dad arrived from work. Being Too Firm can create sneaky kids. Some parents do spank, yell and hit their kids often. These parents also measure Too Firm at 8,9, or 10 on the Discipline Stick. Being too firm can create both anxious kids and bullies. At the opposite end of the Discipline Stick at numbers 1, 2, and 3 are the Not Firm parents. Oh, they might yell, criticize, and hit but they end up giving in to their kids' demands. The kids tune out the yelling because they know their Push-Over Parents will give in. These parents are definitely Not Firm. They tend to create undisciplined, disrespectful, and self-centered kids. Not Firm and Too Firm can be measured by: The sound of your voice The look on your face The words you say The emotions you feel The actions you take Not Firm: (numbers 1-3) Gives a consequence Looks serious Feels unsure Says, "Oh, all right." Doesn't follow through Too Firm:(numbers 8,9,10) Yells or uses silent treatment Looks stern Feels stern May say cruel things May hit, use put-downs, or criticize Just Right (numbers 4-7) Just Right sits in the wide middle of the Discipline Stick. It enshrines the space between Not Firm and Too Firm. To parent Just Right before disciplining your kids, ask yourself this powerful question, "How can I be both Kind and Firm? To remind yourself to be Kind and Firm get your Discipline Stick Bookmark. Visit our Online Store, Books and Products. You'll find it included with the 21 Day Calendars. The Wrap-Up: The children of the Too Firm dad grew up to resent him. Children of Not Firm parents tend to argue with and walk all over them. The Just Right parenting style is in the middle between 4-7. If you discipline at either extreme, you can change. To parent Just Right before disciplining, ask yourself this powerful question, "How can I be both kind and firm?" Our next newsletter will examine how to parent "Just Right." Parenting Tip Respect and protect. My stepfather was a very angry man. He and my mother fought often. He was cruel to all of us children. I decided to treat my own son completely different. I chose to respect and protect him. Today he is a hard worker, a good husband and a loving father. -Janice Harris, Mother, Grandmother, Beauty Consultant Childhood Wisdom Dear Mr. God, I wish you would not make it so easy for people to come apart. I had to have 3 stitches and a shot. Janet About the Author Jean Tracy,MSS invites you to sign up for her FREE Parenting Newsletter, Tips and Tools for Character Builders. Learn powerful parenting concepts that you can use right now! Informative articles written by this seasoned therapist give you the tips and tools you must use to raise your awesome kids with solid characters. Download her FREE bonding activities when you subscribe at: KidsDiscuss.com You are welcome to reproduce this Parenting Newsletter when you include the above information about the author. Forward it to your friends too. Copyright 2005 KidsDiscuss.com Please rate this Ezine at the Cumuli Ezine Finder http://www.cumuli.com/ezines/vote.html? pub_code=charac email: jeantracy@kidsdiscuss.com web: http://www.KidsDiscuss.com Forward email This email was sent to jeantracy@kidsdiscuss.com, by jeantracy@kidsdiscuss.com Update Profile/Email Address | Instant removal with SafeUnsubscribe | Privacy Policy. Powered by KidsDiscuss.com | PO Box 6102 | Edmonds | WA | 98026

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